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7 Habits of Highly Effective Quitters

March 7, 2013 By 14 Comments

We’re switching gears today.

Today I want to talk about those people that don’t get a lot of mentions here on the blog.

The unsung heroes.

The ones who are always right.

The ones that never get enough attention.

The realistic ones.

The quitters.

This ones for you.

And for all of you doers out there – maybe you can pick up a lesson or two from these 7 Habits of Highly Effective Quitters

7 Habits of Highly Effective Quitters

1. Don’t Even Start

The best quitters never even start. After all the best way to quit is to quit before you even start. That way you leave no question about things. If you don’t start anything, you’ll have so much more room for other activities!

activities

Seriously, the more time you waste on doing something or pursuing something you want, the less time you have for important activities like quitting projects, complaining and generally talking about how lame it is that nothing ever works out.

2. Get Really Good At Explaining Your Excuses

Now, if you’re really unfortunate, you might have some friends who want you to make yourself better.

STOOOPID.

Work on your quick draw. Have at least 5 really great excuses ready for why you didn’t start.

  • I’m tired.
  • It’s hard.
  • It’s complicated
  • It’d easy
  • You don’t understaaannnnnnnd (best one ever)

Remember, use the last one only in emergencies. Or every single time you’re questioned. Either way. Unstoppable. Win!

Another stellar option is any time someone does something they’re proud of quickly dismiss this with a flip “I could totally do that”, quickly followed up by a short list of totally legitimate reasons why it’s not worth your time because you’re better than them.

It simultaneously lets you be egotistical, diminish others accomplishments without making you actually have to do anything. 3 birds. 1 stone. Boom.

3. Believe Your Own Stories

It’s not enough to convince others about your excuses. You need to sell it to yourself.

COMMIT TO IT

You know how Christian Bale lost 60+ pounds to be in the Machinist? You need to do that. Become the person you need to be in order to sell yourself on your inability.

machinist

Forget all of your natural talents, abilities and potential if you actually applied yourself. Focus on the obstacles and convince yourself how hard you specifically have it.

Remember, the key to this is maintaining a vacuum. Here’s a few tips.

  1. Believe the world revolves around you and your happiness. If you do, life will make more sense and you can become more easily outraged at the fact that traffic doesn’t stop when you need it to and that the billions of people for some strange reason aren’t acting with your specific intersts in mind. For some reason they’re not considering YOUR NEEDS while going about their 7 billion other lives. WTF?
  2. Do your best to forget the fact that you have more opportunity and technology available to you than 90% of the world and pretty much all of human history.

Remember, your life is hard because

  • you don’t know what terms to google to figure out just about anything you could want to learn.
  • the gym is like, at least, ten minutes away from your house.
  • people might look at you weird if you try something different
  • flying around the world takes all of 12 hours. 
  • candy bars are really tempting.

Life. Is. Rough.

Stay away from news about wars, poverty and other basic things like water or education that other people struggle with on a day to day basis . Those might tempt you to think that your definition of “hard” might be slightly relative.

Lies.

Remember, this is about all about you. Whatever you do, remember that it doesn’t matter how thin the pretense for your excuse is. If you believe it to your core – it doesn’t matter if others believe you or not. You’ve already won.

4. Make Sure To Tell Others

It’s not good enough for you to quit. There’s strength in numbers so make sure to spread it around. Surround yourself with other quitters.

Hopefully, these are people who are well practiced in the art of giving up before they ever started.

If you’ve got friends who are actually trying to do something, be sure to tell them them to give up as soon as possible. Encourage them to quit quit and remind them of how hard it is. Focus on why they can’t do it and why the idea is dumb and the other countless reasons why action is pointless. Offer unsolicited advice about why it’s impossible.

If you can make them discouraged, you’ve got a good chance.

The louder you are, the better. If you have a whiney voice – practice it in the mirror. It will let people know that your reasons are really serious and emotional. Bonus points if you throw in: “I used to think that too but then I became [smarter/faster/older/wiser/better] than to believe such things. Condescending sneers are encouraged.

5. Spend Lots of Time Consuming

Every once in a while you might feel like doing something yourself.

Screw that (see item #1).

Never create anything yourself. This is a gateway drug. If you do this, you might create more things, find that they’re useful and get addicted to making things and impressing your will upon the world.

Stop. 

Fill any and all free time with mindless activities. Ideally these include Netflix, Reality TV, Celebrity Gossip, Video Games, YouTube videos and Cat GIFs.

Whatever you can do to numb your mind – do it.

If you feel the need to satisfy doing something, here’s a quick fix.

  1. Don’t do it (this is important).
  2. Google “person doing X activity”
  3. Find a website/youtube channel or other outlet of some person doing X activity.
  4. Read & Watch everything they’ve ever written. Once you’ve gone through all their content, go through it again.
  5. Breathe & Relax. You’ve successfully avoided the temptation to do something yourself. You’ll notice the dopamine start to fill your brain as you reassure yourself that, “I’m reading about people doing cool things – so I get partial credit for doing them myself.”

6. Never Try Anything New

Pick one language in one town and one thing and stick to it. Go on vacation one time a year – hopefully on a cruise so you can go to a lot of different coutnries but still experience all-you-can-eat-buffets, casinos and ‘MURICA! while never getting off the boat.

If you start to think about doing something new: immediately pre-disqualify yourself (use imaginary reasons if necessary). These new ideas are dangerous and if let them progress too far, they may lead to action. Don’t let this happen (again, see rule #1).

7. Be Really Defensive

No one has the right to challenge you. No one.

They don’t know what you’ve been through and they’re not you – so how dare they try and challenge you to change something and do it better?

It doesn’t matter if they have a good point, a different point of view or other experiences that might be beneficial to you in some way/shape/form and it especially doesn’t matter if they care about your or not.

Don’t try to listen. Instead defend your status quo to the death. It can’t get here fast enough!

Be as easily offended as possible. That way everyone will know you’re right by how outraged you get. Never even consider thinking about another point of view. That will make other people think that you think you’re wrong – which you never could be. No one can understand your unique position in life, but through sheer cunning and ingenuity, you understand everything perfectly and can dissect world problems with surgeon-like precision.

Remember: your rightness is directly correlated with how angry you can get.

If possible, avoid any actual discussion as much as possible. Better yet, if you’ve done your homework on step #4, you should be surrounded only by people who only approve of your current lack of activities – that way you never have to question yourself.

If you do this right, you’ll never even even have to interact with any of these “offensive” people, but you’ll always feel like you’re being actively persecuted by them (so you get the best of both worlds!).

Above All

Above all, remember that anytime you come to a crossroads, just quit. It’s the easiest thing in the world – and after all – life is about making things easy. I mean seriously, if it’s hard, that must mean it’s probably not worth doing.

And remember: the easy choice is always the right choice. Always.

—

Or…you could suck it up, decide that what you want is worthwhile, realize your excuses suck and that it’s not all about you, decide to do the hard stuff anyways, put your head down, persevere and go for it….but that sounds way too hard.

—

Reminder: If you want to submit your New Years transformation entry, you can do so here.

Filed Under: Adventures, Fitness, Life, Writing Tagged With: , ,

40 Degrees and Rainy With 100% Chance Of Windsprints

June 1, 2012 By 14 Comments

rainy

Yesterday

It’s been raining all morning. Grey, dreary rain.

I’m freezing too. I look around the chilled house and realize it’s dropped a few degrees outside so I look up the temperature online – 49 degrees. It’s May.

I glance at my workout schedule – windsprints. I almost laugh. The thought is ridiculous.

40 Degrees. Rainy. 0% of Windsprints today

I tell myself. No way. No how.

Hell no.

I look back down at my computer and get back to work. I fire off a few emails, talk to a client and tidy up some loose ends. I look back at my workout schedule.

Windsprints.

Staring right at me.

Nope. Not going to do it. 

I try to focus back on my work, but my mind is already started arguing with itself.

I don’t want to go.

I don’t want to do it.

Not today.

You can’t make me.

I fire an email off at Vic telling him about the rain, and the temperature – too cold to run, I say – hoping that will be an excuse enough for him to go easy on me.

I wait 3 minutes and send him another one without waiting for a response – already knowing what it would be.

“I hate you”, I type as I stand up and head to my room to look for clothes.

I layer up like I’m about to visit the tundra.

  • Under Armor, check..
  • Sweatshirt, check.
  • Shorts, check.

I peek outside – still way too cold for sprints.

I walk back in, glance at my computer and think for a second how much easier it’d be to just sit down and stay in – it’s way too cold after all (and it’s raining!). But results don’t care about your excuses.

I glance back and rummage through my closet.

  • Sweatpants, Check
  • Winter Hat, Check

It’s May. IT’S MAY! I tell myself. This shouldn’t be happening.

Last week I was in the Dominican Republic! What happened, where am I and what did people do with spring in Chicago when I was gone?

I mutter something under my breath and then walk outside. As the cold hits me, I say outloud to no one in particular.

REALLY? TODAY? REALLY?

I’ve got 2 days left in this workout regimen. Today’s the last tough day. Tomorrow’s slow and easy. And today – of all days – spring in Chicago decided it wanted to pretend it was February.

@#&^!

It doesn’t matter anymore. I let out a small grunt and I’m already outside. Cold, wet, outside. Great.

Sprint day. 

I hate sprint day. Run until you can’t breathe anymore – who decided this was fun?

Vic, I hate Vic – I tell myself.  This is all his fault. ALL HIS FAULT.

But Vic didn’t make me sprint outside. I did. I’m not sure why, but that realization makes it easier. I accept it, settle down and walk to my starting point.

Here we go.

50 yards. Down and back. I run in the middle of my street – quiet enough to not have to watch out for cars – but busy enough that I still get odd looks when they pass by. At this point I could care less. I’m used to it.

50 down and back. Then rest as I walk back 50 yards to do it again.

Then again.

And again.

And again.

Over and over and over.

The sets blur together and I lose count of how many I’ve done. I know that I’ll be out here for 20 minutes at the least – there’s no use in keeping track of the number of sprints I do. I don’t care about time either – I care about running till I’m out of breath.

Down and back. Down and back. Down and back.

21 minutes later, I look down at my watch. I’m done…

…almost…

Hill sprints are optional – but I do them anyways. I don’t know why – maybe I like pain. When you’re already this deep, you might as well keep going. In a workout, when you get the choice between hard and easy – the hard way always makes you stronger. Mentally, if nothing else.

I walk around the corner and look up at the hill.

*sigh*

REALLY? REALLY?

It’s not incredibly steep, but it’s long. 200? 250, maybe 300 yards? I’m not sure, but it’s far enough to wear me out sprinting on a flat surface, much less an incline. This hill won’t be fun.

The thought of turning around and walking back home crosses my mind, but I barely finish the thought before I’m off.

My legs are tired. The wind, the rain and the hill all conspire to pull me down, but I keep sprinting – noticeably slower than before – but sprinting none the less.

Breathing heavy, I get about halfway and start to slow. I dig back in and kick as much as I can until I reach the top and realize I want to puke.

“One.”

I walk back down to the bottom of the hill.

Why am I doing this?

Again.

I take off, a little bit slower, but I make it to the top.

“Two.”

One last time. This one is tougher, but I keep pushing until the hill levels off.

“Three.”

Done, I breathe finally and half walk/half-jog down the hill – as the rain cools me down – the same rain that threatened to keep me shut in.

I walk back inside – 36 minutes later. My sweatshirt is sopping wet. My sweatpants are too.  I don’t know how they got this wet, as I take them off and throw them near the laundry and change. Somehow though – I’m done. Thank God.

As I settle down at the computer – I notice something’s different than earlier. I look at the rain – it’s still coming. I check the weather – it’s still cold. Everything’s still the same…but me. I’m stronger.

40 Degrees.

Rainy.

100% Chance of Windsprints.

Damn straight. #rah

—
photo credit: pennacook

Filed Under: Adventures, Impossible Things, Kicking A**, Life, Personal Development, Writing

The Women’s Guide To Triathlon

May 7, 2012 By 9 Comments

Today is the first ever guest blog post here at the Blog of Impossible Things. We don’t do these often (read never), but today’s post is special.

As I went to put together Impossible TRI, I realized that I could speak a lot to triathlon from the men’s side of the world, but there was still 50% of our audience that’d I’d be forgetting to address – all the women reading this who want to run a triathlon. So, while writing it, I asked Susan to step in on behalf of the women triathletes and tell it like is – no excuses allowed. With Susan’s regular columns at Competitor.com and No Meat Athlete as well as an Ironman and dozens and dozens of triathlon races under her belt, I knew she knew her stuff.

We decided her advice shouldn’t just be relegated to the triathlon guide, so I asked her again to step up and write a guest post – just for the girls.

susan lacke womens triathlon

So, ladies, if you want to do a triathlon, but think you’re a little intimidated by the prospect of jumping into such a testosterone-drenched sport – Susan’s here to kick your butt.

Take it away Susan!

***

It’s Ladies Night at The Blog of Impossible Things!

I’ve kicked Joel out and taken over today with my feminine wiles (contrary to what my habits of peeing in bushes and blowing snot rockets may have you believe, I do have feminine wiles).  I recently had the delightful opportunity to work with Joel on Impossible TRI, and upon the release of the book, both of us heard the same thing from many women:

A lot of y’all are scared of triathlon!

What gives, girls? Look, I know the sport seems intimidating. If you go to any triathlon, it’s a real sausage fest – there are far more men in the sport than women. But that doesn’t mean women can’t do it. Women can, and should, be a part of the triathlon community. Listen, we were built for the pain of childbirth…surely we can handle a little swim/bike/run, right?

I’d like to help you get started. In addition to my contributions to Impossible TRI, Joel has asked me to share a few tips for women looking to get started in the sport: 

“Shrink and Pink”…

Because triathlon is still a relatively new sport, manufacturers are still learning a lot of things – specifically, that making triathlon gear for women is more than just making men’s gear in a smaller size and dying it pink. Though our gear looks identical, my partner, Neil, and I can’t exactly swap bike shorts without consequence. Eliminating the ick factor (dude, his sweaty balls were in there), Neil’s gear is constructed for men. It won’t work for my – ahem – delicate flower.

Female-specific bike shorts have a chick-friendly chamois (the padded part), a wider cut in the hips and thighs, and bigger leg openings. There’s also female-specific triathlon suits (with built in sport bras), goggles (made to fit our smaller eye sockets), bike seats, and more. When purchasing triathlon clothing and gear, search for female-specific options.

…But Don’t Go Lady-Crazy

Just because there’s female specific options doesn’t mean you have to purchase them. For example, when it comes time to purchase a bike, don’t let anyone pigeonhole you to the “women’s-specific” options. My first bike wasn’t women’s-specific; my current bike (a triathlon bike) is. There is a wide variety of bike sizes and geometry available for riders, and a good bike salesperson should be more interested in getting you on a bike that fits you and your budget, even if it is a so-called “men’s” bike.

Find Your Girls…

If the thought of sharing a swim, bike, or run course with a bunch of aggressive, Type-A males intimidates you, consider women-only events until you feel more comfortable in the sport. SheROX, See Jane Run, and Athleta Iron Girl are just a few race organizations who put on triathlons specifically for females. Many bike shops and triathlon clubs have organized group rides and runs for females only, for those afraid of not being able to keep up with the guys.

 …But Don’t Shy Away From The Guys!

For the longest time, I put off participating in my triathlon team’s co-ed group rides because I was scared. The rides were mostly attended by faster guys, and I worried I wouldn’t be able to hold my own with them. One day, on a promise from one of the guys that they wouldn’t leave me behind, I headed out on my first group ride and was instantly hooked. Even though the guys were faster than me, they motivated me so much that I wanted to stay with them, so I worked harder. Those guys knew how to push buttons I never knew existed. As a result, I became a much faster rider – and got a new set of big brothers in the process.

womens triathlon susan lacke ironman

Most Importantly:

Though most guys are really cool and welcoming of women in the sport, some guys in this sport fear getting “chicked,” tri-slang for “beat by a girl.” This paranoia about being beat by the “weaker sex” causes some guys to live up to their anatomical namesake – yup, they can be real dicks.

I once did a triathlon where I ran alongside such a dick for a little bit. He was full of smack talk, and it was kind of intimidating at first. Eventually, though, his jokes about my running skirt and pink sports bra became annoying, and I decided to run harder just to teach him a lesson. I soon dropped him, and hit the turnaround of the run course long before he did. When our paths crossed again, he was struggling. I just smiled and waved as I dashed off toward the finish line.

The moral of the story? Don’t let the dicks intimidate you. If (actually, when) you beat those jerks, just smile and wave.

After all, it isn’t ladylike to gloat.

It’s time to stop being so scared of triathlon. Put on your big-girl pants and come join me at the races! Impossible TRI has training plans for girls (and guys) as well as interviews with myself and 4x Ironman and 15x 1/2 Ironman Hailey Manning. Got more lady-specific questions as you get started? You can always shoot them my way via Twitter (@SusanLacke).

Filed Under: Fitness, The Impossible, Triathlons, Writing Tagged With: , ,

Bullsh*t Qualifications

January 12, 2012 By 86 Comments

I had another post lined up for today, but I got angry so I wrote this instead. Fair Warning.

—

Bullsh*t Qualifications

Qualifications

  • Entry Level position. 3 to 5 years experience required.
  • Bachelor’s/Master’s Degree Required.
  • 30+, has a job & family.

Bullsh*t

Bullsh*t Qualifications.

They’re everywhere. Boldfaced lies. Every last one of ‘em.

  • You have to do things this way.
  • You have to act this way to succeed.
  • You have to fit into our little box of what we want if you ever want to be something.

Bullsh*t. And you know it.

All of ‘em. 

The Purpose Of Qualifications

Qualifications create a framework for busy people to filter through junk. It’s their best guess at what they think might work…maybe.

In the midst of the sea of average, qualifications are used to filter for characteristics. And, because it’s hard to filter for characteristics on their own, people create qualifications that are used as a substitute. It’s hard to figure out if people are honest, trustworthy, respectful, knowledgeable, or even nice, from a glance. It’s much easier to look at their qualifications than their characteristics.

So people use qualifications to make generalizations on average. Think of it this way.

On average, with X qualifications, people have Y characteristic.

  • On average, a person with 3-5 years of experience has already been somewhat trained in a certain environment and is self-aware enough not to do anything embarrassing to the company (hopefully).
  • On average, a person with a bachelor’s degree means they have the basic intelligence & commitment to spend 4 years in school and graduate without dying from alcohol poisoning.
  • On average, a person who’s 30+ has a somewhat stable life under their belt, is heading into the middle of their career and starting to settle into a rhythm for their life.

The Problem with Qualifications

Qualifications are great at widespread generalizations. That’s about it (enjoy the irony of that statement).

Qualifications don’t handle exceptions to the rule. Qualifications don’t do well with outliers. Qualifications can’t even tell you situational effectiveness of a person. They can tell you they passed a certain test, or did a certain activity, but they can’t tell you how a person will react in a situation and they don’t know how to deal with remarkable. Most of all: qualifications are never actually required. They’re also pretty damn boring.

[tweet https://twitter.com/joelrunyon/status/157172434141847553 align='center']

You never need to be qualified to do something.

PERIOD

The Rules of Qualifications

Rules matter far less than you think and oftentimes, they don’t matter at all. Qualifications are supposed to level the playing field. They make things “fair”. People with the same qualifications are supposed to be rewarded the same, get the same things and act similarly. Those are the rules. That’s how we know it’s fair. One problem.

Life is not fair.

Read that again. Accept it. Then screw qualifications and break the rules.

Not all rules matter. In fact, most don’t. And if you’re not willing to break some of the rules that don’t matter, you simply don’t care enough. I’m not talking about lying, stealing and cheating. Treat people well and treat them with respect. But don’t be a sheep.

Just because something always has been done a certain way, doesn’t mean it has to stay the same. Just because people say that you have to wait five years to get a promotion doesn’t mean you do. Just because people say that the safest plan is to have one job that can lay you off at a moment’s notice, doesn’t mean it is.

Do something you’re not remotely qualified to do. Figure it out. 

—

A Real Life Parable

Yesterday, a television casting director contacted me. He asked if I knew anyone who was quitting their job, wanted to sell all of their stuff and move to paradise. He was making a TV pilot and was looking to cast people who were looking to do something similar.

Well, I’ve got 350+ people in a community, plus a bunch of people on twitter and facebook who would probably be interested in doing something along those lines, so I told him I’d put out the word and see if we’d peek anyone’s interest. So I did.

[tweet https://twitter.com/joelrunyon/status/157156687294377986 align='center']

I got a massive set of replies from people who were interested. They would LOVE to be on TV and do just that, quit their job, sell their stuff and move to paradise. This was their dream.

I was planning on replying to them all, but there were too many, too quick so I followed it up with a link to more information

[tweet https://twitter.com/joelrunyon/status/157170463561359361 align='center']

The tweet linked to the casting director’s site with some of the casting info and “qualifications” (it’s still live if you’d like to apply).

One line in particular read:

The ideal candidate is 30+, has a job and a family that will be impacted by a decision of this magnitude, and has a destination in mind. For the pilot episode, we’re focusing on dream locations in North America and the Caribbean.

Immediately people started dropping like flies. I got a flurry of emails and tweets from people who already opted out,  saying they didn’t qualify because of different “qualifications” on the page.

  • I’m not 30.
  • I don’t have a family.
  • I’m not sure where I want to go.
  • Etc, etc, etc
Bullsh*t. All of it.

The Sin of Pre-disqualification

I’m not really mad at the people that wrote me saying those things. Really, I probably sound pretty angry, and I am, but not at them. The thing that pisses me off about this is that the fatalistic attitude is everywhere. There’s no chance of success, so why even try? I didn’t know a word for this idea, so I made one up (at least I’m pretty sure it doesn’t exist yet).

Pre-disqualification - Rejecting yourself before you even try.

Rejecting yourself because it hurts less than attempting something, anything and potentially getting rejected from someone else (even if there’s a good chance of success).

No one sent in a video and actually got rejected. No one contacted Michael to ask if those requirements were set in stone. They didn’t dig a little deeper to get more information. They just gave up at the first hurdle they could find and threw in the towel as fast as they could.

When that happens, there’s only one question to ask:

Are You Really Going To Let That Stop You?

The thing that pisses me off is that for the longest time I did the exact same thing. I believed the lies. I believed that I could only do something if I was qualified to do it. I believed you had to follow rules that didn’t matter. I believed that I had to fit into a box of what people expected from me, mind my own business and never try to change anything and everything would just be okay, because eventually I’d have qualifications and someone would want to pick me. Someday…maybe…right?

As a result, I pre-disqualified myself from so many things, without even giving it a shot. After all, if no one will pick me, why even try?

  • I’m not a great writer, so why bother writing anything?
  • I’m not very fast, so why would I even attempt Track & Field?
  • I’m nowhere near smart enough for my dream job, so why not take the safe job?
  • I’m not in her league, so why ask her out?
  • I’m from the midwest, so why try to move to the coasts?
  • I’m too skinny, so why try football?
  • I’ve never been a runner, so why start now?
  • I didn’t go to a prestigious enough school, so why try for anything better?
  • I could never run my own business, so why not just work for 40 years for someone else?

You name the qualification. I didn’t have it. So I passed on doing what I wanted without even trying.

I played by the rules that everyone else did and I ended up where everyone else was.

The only thing qualifications are good for are making general statements about large groups of people without identifying individual use cases that lie outside the norm (go ahead, enjoy the irony in this statement).

  • This is why resumes are worthless. They sit in a pile, waiting to get picked. Create an anti-resume instead.
  • This is why a bunch of people are occupying parks around the country hoping to be be picked for jobs in this economy. Instead of a park,  occupy yourself instead.
  • This is why I finally got all the qualifications they said I should get and then sat around waiting to get picked and nothing ever happened.

If you’re waiting to be picked, you’re doing it wrong. 

PICK YOURSELF

If you do, you begin to find out what Michael told me in one of our email exchanges – that qualifications don’t really matter (emphasis mine):

 The ideal candidate is still at their current job, yes — but I won’t turn anyone away based on any of the criteria. At this stage of pilot development, the “ideal candidate” changes every ten minutes. =)

You Get Exactly One Life

This image by Colin Wright has been kicking my butt for the last 6 weeks.

You have exactly one life in which to do everything you’ll ever do. Act accordingly. - Colin Wright, Exile Lifestyle

One Life

YOU HAVE ONE SHOT

You do not get a second chance at this life thing. This isn’t a video game. You do not get to replay for another quarter. You do not get a mulligan. You do not pass GO. You do not collect $200, etc.

Life is too short to let other people make up qualifications based on their life experiences that decide what you can or cannot do with yours.

Qualifications are bullsh*t.

You will never, ever, ever, ever be “qualified” for anything worth doing. Do it anyways.

[tweet https://twitter.com/joelrunyon/status/157172434141847553 align='center']

 

What do you want to do?

 

 

[your answer goes here]

 

 

Now go do that.

Not qualified? Do it anyways. Seems Impossible? Find a way. Because while it’s easy to blame others and third parties such as standards and qualifications that you might not live up to, the only person who ever truly disqualifies you to do something is yourself.

Never, ever forget that.

–

Chris Guillebeau wrote about the same topic much more elegantly than I ever could. Read his qualifications then please stop pre-disqualifying yourself from things before you even start. They’re bullsh*t and you know it.

Filed Under: Blogging, Business, Impossible Things, Kicking A**, Life, Personal Development, Writing

Epic ≠ Long

December 20, 2011 By 19 Comments

This is a note that I jotted down from a conversation I had with Nate Damm when he was walking across America:

Epic

Epic ≠ Long. Too many people mistake writing something epic with writing something long. You don’t have to write 3,000 words to make something worth reading. You just have to make it worth reading.

Filed Under: Blogging, Writing Tagged With: , , ,

Know What You Want

December 5, 2011 By 6 Comments

Want

This is an excerpt from Impossible: The Manifesto. It’s available tomorrow, December 6th, for free.

“A story involves a character that wants something and overcomes conflict to get it.”

What do you want?

What do you want out of life? Our of your job? Out of your family? Out of your relationships? Do you even
know?

Sure, you might want something, but it’s not enough to just want something.

Great characters want great things. But even more than that, great characters want great things…that are worthwhile.

Now I can’t tell you what’s worthwhile for you. What’s considered worthwhile is different for everyone and it’s something you have to decide for yourself. Be careful because there are a lot of things that are desirable, but very few are worthwhile. Ever seen SkyMall?

Unfortunately, it’s rare to find somebody pursuing something worthwhile, because those things are a lot harder to acquire and you’re going to have to fight for them.

There are a lot of things that are commonplace that people pursue, but they’re not really worth fighting for. They’re token. They’re dull. They’re ordinary.

They’re mundane. And nobody fights over the mundane.

But the Impossible…that’s another story. The rare things in life. The things that most people don’t do. The things that are hard to acquire.

Those are worthwhile. Those are worth the investment. Those are worth the fight.

When you want something, make sure you want something worthwhile.

Because eventually you are going to have to fight for it.

And it better be worth it.

***
The manifesto is available for download tomorrow here for free – just cause I like you guys that much.

Filed Under: Adventures, Blogging, Life, The Impossible, Writing Tagged With: ,

Nice People Don’t Change The World

December 1, 2011 By 82 Comments

Nice people don’t change the world and you don’t put a ding in the universe by getting everyone to like you.

Filing Down The Edges

When we’re kids we’re taught to get along with people. The advice goes something like this:

  1. Go with the flow.
  2. Don’t cause a ruckus.
  3. Fit in and do what everyone says and everything will be okay.

So you work on filing down the rough edges of anything that might be remotely offensive until you’re a bland, sanitized, boring shell of who you’re meant to be. You usually know you’ve finally arrived when people begin to call you “nice.”

Nice? That’s it? Really? They couldn’t find another word to describe you? How about:

  • Bold
  • Courageous
  • Compassionate
  • Mind-Numbingly Intelligent
  • Clever
  • Ambitious
  • Witty
  • Loyal
  • Masterful
  • Proficient
  • Resilient
  • Decisive
  • Focused
  • Savvy
  • Problem Solver
  • Confident
  • Analytical
  • Strategic
  • Dedicated
  • Independent
  • Strong
  • Truthful
  • Trustworthy
  • Self-Reliant
  • Enthusiastic
  • Curious
  • Artful
  • Talented
  • Determined
  • Humorous
  • Innovative
  • Technical
  • Insightful
  • Wise
  • Creative
  • Persistent
  • Visionary
  • Resourceful
  • Wise
  • Effective
  • Thrilling
  • Efficient
  • Zealous
  • Calming
  • Tenacious
  • Optimistic
  • Adaptable
  • Tenacious
  • Adventurous
  • Energetic
  • Kind
  • Helpful

Just to name a few. They couldn’t pick one of those? They had to pick nice?

The Problem With Nice

“Nice” is a neutered word. It’s a pleasantry that we use to say about someone when there’s nothing else to say about them. But, somewhere along the line, “nice” becomes a goal. It’s something to shoot for. Instead of worrying about accentuating the skills that make you – you, we become embroiled in the sea of sameness as we waddle towards the central line of mediocrity.

Instead of focusing on doing something that matters, and focusing on being who you were meant to be, we neuter the adjectives and the people themselves by aiming for nice. Instead of focusing on what you know you need to be doing, you rearrange your life priorities to do what other people view as acceptable and appease their expectations. You start to hear these statements:

I really hope they’re nice.

That seems like a nice place

What’d you think about Frank? Oh, he’s nice.

Filler statements that don’t mean anything but a low-level of acceptance that means you don’t have terribly offensive body odor. We’re told that “nice’ is a great goal because you can’t get people to like you if you have body odor, and we all want people to like us, right?

The problem is that nice people seldom do big things because they’re so afraid of stepping on anyone’s toes that stepping outside their comfort zone is paralyzing and doing something that matters and changing the world involves getting wayyyyyyyy outside of your comfort zone (and stepping on a few toes now and then).

If you start to do something important, you’ll hit resistance. You’ll make people uncomfortable, offended or even angry. People will push back even if it doesn’t directly affect their life. They won’t like what you’re doing because it makes them have to consider the fact that maybe (just maybe) someone else has created a bigger story and a bigger world to live in and that the the small, safe world they created for themselves might not be the only way to live.

One of my favorite examples of this is Nate. He wanted to walk across america. So he did. One step at a time. He met a lot of great people, but a lot of people got weirded out by some guy with a stroller walking down the street. He had people call the cops on him, yell at him to get a job and generally tell him how much of a waste of time his walk was. He kept walking. 3000 freaking miles. If he had stopped the first time someone said something mean to him or told him that he was dumb, crazy or out-of-line, he would have turned around 100 miles into it and missed out on a life-changing experience. Nate’s determined, persistence, and dedicated, but I wouldn’t call him nice. Respectful, but not nice. And yes, there’s a difference.

- Not Insane -

Respectful vs. Nice

There’s a line between not worrying about being nice and being a jerk. You shouldn’t be concerned with making people like you. That’s a waste of your time and you’ll end up “nice” – and we don’t want that. Be kind, respect others and treat them like you would like to be treated (<– IMPORTANT). But (and this is equally important), don’t worry about making people mad just because your dissenting opinion makes them angry. Just because they want something different from life than you does not mean you need to change the way you live yours to please them. Smile. Shake their hand and be on your way. Life is too short to spend on people who want to get mad at you for living life your way. You can’t make everyone happy, so stop trying.

I don’t know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.” - Bill Cosby

- Not Everybody’s Red -

On Changing The World

If you want to change the world (or even do something moderately important and meaningful in your own life) – something that matters, you should know one thing:

Not everyone will to be happy about it.

Do it anyways.

If you walk across America, you’ll have people tell you’re an asshole for walking on the wrong side of a bridge. Do it anyways. If you write a book that changes lives, you’ll get some trolls who tell you that it sucks. Do it anyways. If you want to quit your job to travel the world, you’ll get some weird looks and have people wonder if you’ve lost your mind. If you want to do something that matters, you’ll probably piss of a lot of people. Do it anyways.

- Do Something -

While everyone else is busy trying to get other people to like them and call them nice, do something that matters. Do something. Make something. Lead something. Do something that matters.

To be nobody-but-yourself — in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else — means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting. – E.E. Cummings.

Everybody else has a script for your life that they want you to live. The most important thing you can do is write your own. People will get mad. Do it anyways.

***

If this post rubbed you the wrong way, get over it. I’m not here to make you feel good. I’m here to make you do something. If you want to do something, join the latest challenge in the League. Make a change. Otherwise, don’t complain about why things aren’t the way you want. If you want to do something, you can find a way. If you don’t want to do something, you can find an excuse. Make a change. Do something impossible. You might make people mad along the way. Do it anyways.

***

Impossible: The Manifesto comes out next Tuesday. It’s officially happening. (I’m serious this time!) I’ve got the final pieces in my hands!

***

[If you liked the cartoons, buy lots of Hugh's work, he's pretty great]

Filed Under: Blogging, Life, Personal Development, Story, The Impossible, Writing

Then Die

November 29, 2011 By 42 Comments

Bruce-Lee-Then-Die-Quote

From the Art of Expressing The Human Body, there’s this little story about Bruce Lee, arguably the greatest martial artist that ever lived, during a training run told by John Little, a close friend of Bruce:

“Bruce had me up to three miles a day, really at a good pace. We’d run the three miles in twenty-one or twenty-two minutes. Just under eight minutes a mile [Note: when running on his own in 1968, Lee would get his time down to six-and-a half minutes per mile]. So this morning he said to me “We’re going to go five.” I said, “Bruce, I can’t go five. I’m a helluva lot older than you are, and I can’t do five.” He said, “When we get to three, we’ll shift gears and it’s only two more and you’ll do it.” I said “Okay, hell, I’ll go for it.” So we get to three, we go into the fourth mile and I’m okay for three or four minutes, and then I really begin to give out. I’m tired, my heart’s pounding, I can’t go any more and so I say to him, “Bruce if I run any more,” –and we’re still running-”if I run any more I’m liable to have a heart attack and die.” He said, “Then die.” It made me so mad that I went the full five miles. Afterward I went to the shower and then I wanted to talk to him about it. I said, you know, “Why did you say that?” He said, “Because you might as well be dead. Seriously, if you always put limits on what you can do, physical or anything else, it’ll spread over into the rest of your life. It’ll spread into your work, into your morality, into your entire being. There are no limits. There are plateaus, but you must not stay there, you must go beyond them. If it kills you, it kills you. A man must constantly exceed his level.”

Either push your limits or die. If you’re going to allow yourself to be bound by arbitrary, artificial and anonymous limits, why even bother? One more time (you know you should read it). If you stop at your “limits”…

…you might as well be dead. Seriously, if you always put limits on what you can do, physical or anything else, it’ll spread over into the rest of your life. It’ll spread into your work, into your morality, into your entire being. There are no limits. There are plateaus, but you must not stay there, you must go beyond them. If it kills you, it kills you. A man must constantly exceed his level.”

What’s your level? Are you exceeding it or are you dying? Because if you let limits define what’s possible in your life, you’re not growing, you’re dying.

***

The Impossible Manifesto launches next week. Get excited :) .

Filed Under: Blogging, Good Stories, Impossible Things, Kicking A**, Personal Development, The Impossible, Writing

Be Prolific

October 21, 2011 By 16 Comments

Light Up IdeaYou’re waiting for that one idea.

That one great big shiny idea.

The one idea that will blow up beyond your wildest imagination and lets you turn to some investors and cooly say, “Sure I’ll sell…for a BILLION dollars or so” while cooly gesturing with your hand while watching them not even bat an eye because they’re know it’s worth at least two billion.

One day it will come. In the meantime, you wait.

You’re doing it wrong.

I hate to be the one to break it to you.

You will not just have a perfect Billion dollar idea happen to you.

You’re human. You’re not perfect. So stop trying to have the perfect idea.

Instead be prolific.  

When you’re prolific, the goal isn’t to create a single perfect golden idea directly from conception. You have to create, create, and create some more in order to whittle away at the gorge of ideas you have until one finally begins to emerge as one that’s worth doing..

Don’t create perfection. Become prolific.

How To Become Prolific

If you can’t come up with a perfect idea, try becoming prolific. Here’s a few good steps to get you started:

  1. Come up with a dozen terrible ideas.
  2. Make them better.
  3. Build them.
  4. Ship them.
  5. Come up with a dozen more ideas.
  6. Build them again.
  7. Try them out in the wild.
  8. See what happens.
  9. Repeat

When you’re prolific, one bad idea is enough to start. The point is to practice action. To practice launching. To execute.

Your ideas might be bad, but you can still practice your execution every single day. Slowly, you prune away the ones that aren’t worth pursuing and you continue creating. You continually take action.

Over time, the massive action that you take slowly but surely molds your terrible ideas into slightly less terrible ideas. Eventually they become something mediocre and then maybe…just maybe…something great.

And who knows? One day, you might get struck with a Billion dollar idea, that’d be nice. But it’s a lot more likely to happen if you practice creating every day and learn to execute consistently because you’ve got a lot of work ahead of you.

Don’t be perfect. Be prolific.

[photo]

Filed Under: Blogging, Business, Life, Writing Tagged With:

The Intricate Balancing Act Between Ambition And Insanity

September 27, 2011 By 16 Comments

 

Shoot For The Moon

I must be completely out of my mind.

The past 3 weeks I’ve been busy blowing up my previous limitations of what I thought this blog could be and remaking it into an adventure bigger than myself. I’m busy expanding things, making them bigger, making space for others to join in, but that means I’ve got a ton of things on my plate. Here’s a brief (incomplete) list of some of them at the moment:

My day job. The Blog of Impossible Things. The Impossible League. Impossible League Challenges (First ones start Saturday!). Impossible T-Shirts. NerveRush. ImpossibleHQ. The Impossible Manifesto (yes, that impossible manifesto, is literally in the editor’s hands as we speak). Half-Ironman Training (am I really still doing this?). Freelance Projects 1, 2, and 3. Doing what I can to help Mark & Jeremy make chicago parking better with SpotHero. All the while laying the groundwork for 3 more unannounced projects.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not complaining. They’re projects I love doing. After all, doing is pretty fun. It can get addicting. But you have to be careful (and not just from overdosing on Red Bull either). If you just do a lot of things, but don’t ship any, then you just have a bunch of unfinished work that does nobody any good. Just a bunch of partially finished things that nobody wants and are sitting taking up physical, mental, and emotional space.

So when I have 3 projects at 90% or greater done and more on the way, sometimes I just stare at myself in the mirror and ask myself: Are you insane?

Probably.

That’s the most likely answer after all. I am standing there talking to myself. I should be out of my mind to do some of the things I do. But, I keep pushing, and whenever I want to give up, David Goggins pops into my head:

WHEN YOU THINK YOU ARE DONE YOU’RE ONLY 40% OF WHAT YOUR BODY IS CAPABLE OF DOING. THAT’S JUST THE LIMIT THAT WE PUT ON OURSELVES. – David Goggins

So I refuse to accept what I tell myself my limits are. Because you never really know until you actually find them out for yourself. 

I’d rather be insane, go big and fail spectacularly with a small chance of succes, than play it safe and never take a shot at seeing if the impossible could be done.

And my mirror self could be right. I could be going completely out of my mind, but as Karol told me the other day, “There’s no point in going partially out of your mind.”  Good point.

Some people call it insanity. I call it ambition. The first evidence of which one it is comes next week. Let’s Do This.

***

What are you doing? We’re starting 30 Day Impossible Challenges in the Impossible League in October (Saturday!). Get in on it and win some sweet swag. I’ll be posting the guidelines tonight and the challenges officially start October 1st. GET ON IT! Join The League and meet 130+ people doing the impossible.*

**

Image by Flipkeat

 

 

Filed Under: BIT Updates, Impossible Things, Writing Tagged With: , , , , , ,
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