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You are here: Home / Articles / Concerning “Real Life”

Concerning “Real Life”

March 9, 2015 By Joel Runyon 10 Comments

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Over the past few months, I’ve received a lot of emails that say something like this:

“What you’re doing is cool but, you know, eventually you have to come back to real life. You can’t do this forever…”

This isn’t new. When I started this blog, people said the same thing, but it seems to have picked up even more as of late.

Over the years, I’ve experience a range of emotions when facing this comment:

  • Originally, I got mad.
  • Then I got annoyed.
  • Now, I just get sad.

I got mad because I thought these people were telling me what I was doing was not sustainable.

I got annoyed because I thought they were telling me what to do.

Now I get sad for them because I realize this is their reality.

I realize that some people do have to go back to “reality”, which unfortunately for them, is something they don’t seem to enjoy all that much, even though they created it.

I’m very fortunate, but I’ve also worked really, really, really hard over the past few years to build a life that enables me to do things that I almost pee my pants in excitement about. Running my own business. Helping people to get healthy, push their physical limits, and travel the world.

And it’s not because I’m trying to avoid “real life.”

Here’s the deal: I tried “real life.” When I graduated from college, I tried to do the whole 9-5 office job thing. No one would hire me. Heck, when I tried to get any job at all, I couldn’t even get a call back from Starbucks.

When I finally got a job, I worked my way up. I took a promotion with a bigger company that came with an 8-5 schedule and a desk, because I thought the extra money and experience would be worth the trade off.

It wasn’t. So, after six months, I realized I did not want anything to do with what most people considered “real life.” Maybe I’m impatient, but I knew what I wanted. And that wasn’t sitting behind a desk and working for someone else.

So I tried the “real life” thing and it sucked. I was pushed into creating my own reality because I had no other choice. But that’s all there really is to it. I fell into it backwards. But if I can do it, you can too.

Here’s how:

The Simple 2 Step Process

There’s a very simple two step process to creating your own version of “real life”

  • Realize you don’t want to accept the normal version of reality.
  • Decide to make your own reality.

Ta-da.

It’s that easy. If you need something else to get how simple this concept is, this video by Steve Jobs is one of the most impactful things I’ve ever watched:

Here’s the text of it:

The thing I would say is, when you grow up you tend to get told that the world is the way it is and your life is to live your life inside the world – not bash into the walls to much – try to have a nice family life, have fun, save a little money…but that’s a very limited life…life can be much broader once you discover one simple fact. And that is, everything around you that you call life was made up by people that were no smarter than you. And you can change it, you can influence it. You can build your own things that other people can use. And the minute your realize…that you can change it, you can mold it, That’s maybe the most important thing. I think that’s very important – and once you learn that, you’ll never be the same again.

The Worst That Can Happen

This is always a fun game to play, when you go around and imagine the worst that could happen.

In most cases, the worst that can happen from taking control of your life, and daring to plot your own reality, is that “it all” comes crashing down around you.

But even then, you’d have gotten an amazing experience from it–a MASSIVE learning experience. And the chance to do it all over again.

I’ll take that any day, even if the signposts along the way say things like:

  • Safety not guaranteed
  • Your mileage may vary
  • Results not typical

I’m sure that it’s partly my personality, but it’s partly my reality too. I experienced the uncertainty of not being able to get a job. I see businesses burning through employees every few years. My dad stayed at his job for thirty years before retiring but I don’t know of a company that I could do that with now, even if I wanted to.

The real world isn’t as safe as you’d like to believe it is.

Banks fail. Jobs disappear. Houses don’t always grow in value. Almost any “safe bet” isn’t.

My life might not be some people’s reality, but it’s mine. And I only get one shot, so I’m going to make sure I spend it well.

Even after I publish this post, I’m sure there will be some protestors.

  • I’m sure you can do that.
  • But you don’t understand.
  • It’s so scary.
  • I’m different.
  • I don’t know what to do.

Bull.

It’s all B.S. I was a scared, little kid in my parents’ basement who was so insecure he didn’t know if he could barely run an indoor triathlon.

If I can figure it out, you can figure it out.

The truth is, you can make your life into anything you want it to be. If you want your reality to be the default version of “real life”, you’re certainly allowed to do that.

But if that’s what real life is, excuse me; I’d rather make up my own.

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Filed Under: Articles, Mindset Tagged With: real life

About Joel Runyon

I started IMPOSSIBLE to push myself to try to live a life worth writing about by pushing my limits, living an adventure & telling a great story by doing the impossible. You can get free updates in your inbox via your new favorite newsletter and see all my businesses at Impossible X and our philanthropic efforts at Impossible.org

Comments

  1. Mathias says

    March 9, 2015 at 7:33 am

    Awesome article, I love this mindset of yours! I’ve only just recently started to adopt the idea that you create your own reality, and it is incredibly liberating.

    In the past, whenever I would do something fun for a while (such as go backpacking), I was always weighed down by knowing that I’d have to return to “reality” eventually. Now I realize that “reality” is whatever I want it to be!

    Thanks for the motivating piece!

    Reply
  2. Toes says

    March 9, 2015 at 3:59 pm

    Joel,
    Thank you for this. I often run into people telling me the same thing. It gets a little discouraging after a while, but it’s nice to know there are others like you blazing their own trail.
    Keep up the great work!

    Reply
  3. Michael Baldwin says

    March 9, 2015 at 9:03 pm

    Great article, no bullshit and cuts to the core.

    Reply
  4. Simon says

    March 12, 2015 at 3:32 pm

    Reality is what you make it. There is some excellent advice in here. I have this conversation with my parents regularly. I would much rather go to work every day and be happy then go to work every day and make money.

    And the money I make, it fuels my adventures.

    Reply
  5. carissajade says

    March 19, 2015 at 1:20 pm

    I love this so much. I definitely am guilty of complaining about things I could easily change. But it’s so true that fear is holding me back. Thanks for being inspirational!

    Reply
  6. Joyel says

    March 20, 2015 at 3:36 pm

    .. what?? How on earth would YOU let this bother you. .brush it off… shrug your shoulders.. who fucking cares what loosers say.. haters. be haters. I’m glad you posted this, but I don’t think you’ll change any of their minds. You may open the eyes of a few small crowd…You are doing what you are doing because you are being you in the most authentic way… and that IS ENOUGH.. No need to write a blog post to try to change haters from not being haters. Leave them in the dust.. You rock and they ..don’t…

    BTW.. I’m doing my own impossible things..
    stay tuned…
    website to come..

    Reply
    • Shorouk says

      March 21, 2015 at 5:20 am

      These are not haters which shows in the comments but they’re just people that are so absorbed into “Reality” or “Real-life”!

      I think his words might actually change someone’s mind. If it changes one person’s life for the better then it’s enough, plus he gets to do something out of his impossible list lol

      Reply
  7. Shorouk says

    March 21, 2015 at 5:10 am

    “The real world isn’t as safe as you’d like to believe it is.

    Banks fail. JOBS disappear. Houses don’t always grow in value. Almost any “safe bet” isn’t.”

    It’s so funny… just yesterday I was sitting in this nice 5-stars hotel thinking about all the money this person made and how would I start such a thing if I was in his shoes but then I thought well maybe I would figure it out and all but still what if one time it burns then this might all disappear in a matter of minutes.
    My point is, I agree… you can do all the right/safe things, you can go by “the rules”, but… Life will still happen!!

    Reply
  8. Jenny Sansouci says

    March 27, 2015 at 11:49 am

    You’re cool. 🙂

    Reply
  9. Justin says

    April 9, 2015 at 9:28 am

    I find it weird that people try to pigeon hole what “real life” is suppose to be. It’s almost like there’s this Webster’s dictionary definition of it that we’re ALL suppose to follow.

    The way I see it the average person lives to about 80 now and with 365 days in a year you’ve got roughly 29,200 opportunities to create unique experiences, build amazing relationships, and build your own version of “real life.”

    I’m with you Joel when you say this:

    Originally, I got mad.
    Then I got annoyed.
    Now, I just get sad.

    The only thing I’d like to add is that I after feeling sad I get annoyed and frustrated again because everyone has the opportunity to create their own version of “real life” yet so few are doing do.

    Reply

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