I got a question the other day:
What is the main “why” for you when you do hard stuff? What makes you do the impossible?
The answer for me is pretty simple:
Atrophy
Atrophy is the concept that everything is in a natural state of decay. You know this intrinsically:
- If you don’t get stronger, you naturally get weaker.
- If you’re not getting faster, you’re getting slower.
- If you’re not learning or practicing new things, you’re forgetting them.
It’s not cause you’re bad or you’re doing something wrong, but everything naturally decays when left on it’s own. It’s just what happens.
If you doubt this in any way, go to the gym after you’ve taken a few months off. See if you can lift as much as you did before. Good luck.
Or, try playing the piano after not playing it for 10 years. Have fun with that.
You might remember some parts or be able to lift some weight, but you certainly won’t be where you were when you left off.
While this makes sense when you look at it with that perspective, it turns out humans are really bad at recognizing this when we’re close to it – especially when you’re experiencing it daily rather than looking at accumulated data from an academic standpoint.
In other words, we overestimate how good we are at “coasting” and underestimate how much we need to work to simply maintain the status quo.
That’s why “coasting” isn’t real – it’s just you slowly getting worse over time without noticing it.
But the problem is just that. You don’t notice it…
This lets a large segment of people believe that comfort is synonymous with happiness and that making things easier or finding shortcuts makes life better.
It’s the same reason that people assume that the “impossible” is too difficult or just isn’t worth doing.
As you can probably guess, I fundamentally disagree.
When you step back and look at your life like a third-party observer, things begin to change.
When you pull yourself out of the every day grind and look at your life like a story, your perspective shifts.
- Nobody watches a movie about a character coasting or reads a book about a character playing it safe.
- The best stories are when the characters decide that the something has to change.
- The best stories tend to be the same ones where the characters have the worst odds.
- The best stories tend to be when the characters have the most overwhelming obstacles.
So why do I do hard things? Why am I drawn to them?
Because if you’re not pushing yourself to learn, to get better, then you’re opting for the default, which is decline, getting worse and, quite literally, dying.
For me, I’m fundamentally happier when I’m doing hard things. I’m fundamentally happier when I’m pushing myself, learning new things, taking cold showers, looking like an idiot, hurting myself and sometimes figuring it all out.
The best feeling in the world is busting your butt in a productive meaningful way to achieve something difficult yet important and falling into bed completely spent.
That’s when I’m getting better, improving and living a life worth writing about.
As the New Year kicks off, it’s worth asking yourself: Are you going to be coasting this year or will you choose to push your limits? The choice is up to you.
“That’s why ‘coasting’ isn’t real – it’s just you slowly getting worse over time without realizing it.”
Ha! Love this reminder, Joel. My tour jete isn’t what it used to be. I am going to go dance. (And I did finish that half marathon in Brooklyn last month.)
5 weeks ago my husband, age 47, started flying lessons. The first time he went up in the pilot’s seat, he texted, “well, I sucked at that.” Reminded me of your post – 12 Steps to Sucking Less. Yesterday he went up again and texted, “It went much better.”
Here’s to sucking more, and coasting less.
Happy New Year!
Day 2 of CST, but I cheated on day 1, got into a warm shower and then gradually turned the hot water off, still a yikes at the end! I’ve been coasting way too long. This isn’t going to be easy!
Definitely NOT coasting. Pushing upwards and upwards. A non-competitive person to date. This year I will be competing. Try a Triathon and atleast a half Marathon. Absolutely agree if your staying still you’re sliding backwards.
Consider training with a group raising money for a worthy cause. I did that for the American Stroke Association, never thought I’d get through it at age 53, but I did and it was amazing! At 63, hmmmm, I think I will try a 1/2 marathon first 🙂
I don’t know what site I originally went to that led me to signing up for your emails, but holy shit do I look forward to em. Some make me laugh an some make me reflect on my life an where it’s heading. Thanks for keeping me in check an thinking!
From a a guy stranded in marion indiana,
Ian.
Well I could not have said it better. It’s like you took the words right out of my head! Discipline is my #1 value. For everything. But I am in such a rut, since April 2014. When I was in college I was so incredibly disciplined. I’d do anything and everything. If I wrote it down- I did it no matter what I felt like. But now I’m not quite as disciplined. I just “give up”, or so it feels this way. Yes I want to qualify for the olympic trials marathon (2020), I want to have a great and famous blog that helps people improve their lives, but I feel like I don’t have any “gas” left in me… How can I reboot?
Great article Joel. It will definitely get me off my holiday nostalgic ass.
Joel you’re the man! I’ve always tried to push myself but I would always give up a few days later. After finding your website I’ve learnt to push my comfort zone and to try new and exciting things.I did the 28 days of Cold Shower Therapy without any cheats whatsoever and I’ve never felt more alive afterwards. You’re right when you say everything is in a state of decay. The only way to success is consistency, and this website is a huge motivator in being consistent.
Joel, thank for for a detail answer to my question.
> Atrophy
I didn’t think about atrophy before getting short answer from you on this question. But I felt it very good on my previous full-time job – this job was nice and comfy for 6 months until I applied to new job and fail badly. Though it was a good experience, I didn’t see it’s coming until I did something different i.e. took a step back and saw my life from different perspective.
THIS! The concept of ‘atrophy’; decaying away, wasting away: this is what makes me go for the impossible each time I am doing something. Thankyou for the very eloquently put reminder of why we should “Shoot for the moon; if you miss you’ll land among the stars”.